The agreement

Down the hall, two ladies began a conversation about the recent coding competition. Neither of them had entered, yet each felt the need to justify not competing. While this is pretty typical behaviour, it got interesting when they presented their reasoning.

Lady #1: “I really feel like the spirit of the competition has been lost from last year. Last year everyone was enthusiastic and tried hard to win.”

Lady #2: “Yeah I know what you mean. I really think the spirit of the competition just isn’t what it was last year. I mean last year everyone was way more involved.”

Wait… did lady #2 agree and then restate exactly what lady #1 said? Maybe I’m just imagining things.

Lady #2: “If the spirit of the competition was more on the individual projects rather than on company products I definitely would have joined.”

Lady #1: “Me too. If the competition was focused on the groups projects rather than on the company’s products then I would have competed.”

At this point I am very confused. What kind of conversation is this? It is starting to sound like they are verbally circle-jerking each others ideas.

Lady #1: “I heard that Billy down the hall competed in the competition and that he created some cool new tool.”

Lady #2: “Oh yeah! I did hear that Billy competed in the competition and that he created a tool that is pretty cool and useful.”

At this point I am starting to wonder if someone is going to walk out with a camera and announce that I was pranked on their shitty TV-show.

ctqikhf
I wish I knew Leo… I wish I knew.

This goes on for TEN MINUTES! TEN! I can’t comprehend how this conversation ever took place. If I was in a conversation like that, it would be over very shortly after it began.

I’m still a little baffled by this. Maybe someone down the hall was the one who was pranked by the shitty TV-show and I merely eavesdropped in on it.

Regardless of the reasoning that was some weird shit.

cold-ride-if-you-ask-me-harley-davidson-biker-girls-harleys-guns-motorcycles-are-sexy-trucks-cars-jeeps-motorcycles-biker-babes-biker-chicks-freedom-motorcycle
What better way than to sign off with a nice picture of some naked babes on motorcycles carrying guns?
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The dude

I had just gotten into my office. From a hallway nearby I could hear a couple of people talking louder than absolutely necessary, but this was not unusual. With it being early morning and not having much to do, I eavesdropped.

I couldn’t tell how they got on the subject, but they were talking about the Big Lebowski. They were rather enthusiastic in their discussion and weren’t aware of how loud they were getting. They each began reciting their favorite quotes (OK, they were mostly paraphrasing quotes, some of what they said I am sure was not in the film).

Their volume kept getting louder and louder.

Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not Mr. Lebowski. You’re Mr. Lebowski. I’m the Dude. So that’s what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you’re not into the whole brevity thing.

Then forgetting they were in an office filled with people, one of them start impersonating Walter in a classic scene.

You see what happens, Larry? This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass Larry! This is what happens, Larry! You see what happens Larry? You see what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!

See the clip here

I couldn’t help but cringe as this grown man is yelling in an office building about a movie he was overexcited for.

While this was the first time I heard someone yell in the office, this was certainly not the strangest thing I’ve had the fortune of experiencing at work.

Stick around for more tales from the corporate engineering world.